question 1_friendship.com_10/28-11/4

Reading from the advice forum, on http://www.friendship.com.au/, the issues that arise have a whole lot to do with the challenges people encounter in friendship.  Some of the issues range from knowing how to keep a friend, friend needing support and a lot more. The chapter, in this book on friendship, gave a clear understanding on how, some of these issues can be addressed and avoided. Sadly to say, most people don’t want to invest time in developing a real and lasting friendship with other people. We live in a computerized age, where everything has to be micro-waved or being served in a rush. According to the book, unlike other relationship like marriage and family, which have legal rules governing them, friendship does not. It is a personal decision on both party to determine how friendship is going to last. Most of the issues, which arises from the advice forum, can be as a result of the fear of moving forward, which the book highlighted; many of the friendship relationship remain at that.

Respond constructively to criticism_10/15-10/21

Respond constructively to criticism as defined on the book simply means to respond effectively when others offer constructive criticism. As simple as it may sound, criticism is one of the hardest thing people tend to deal with. It also depends on how we approach the word criticism; it could be positive or negative, giving to the situation is being applied. A positive criticism can be viewed as a constructive response to criticize on a platform to build or pass across information, which may be relevant to us. One of the difficult tasks companies face in our time is having the skill to manage people. Nobody wants to be told what to do, how to act or speak, because it may be offense and self demining. Responding to constructive criticism is one of the essential keys to success in life. Nobody is an island of him or herself, we need people to evaluate us, and it takes a humble and a goal oriented individual to receive a constructive criticism.  

 

 

 

Gibbs defensiveness in communication_10/15-10/21

One of the interactions I could think of that I felt disconfirmed and defensive, was the conversation I had with my Boy Scout commandant, when I was in ninth grade. During my high school years I served as the patrol leader of the Boy Scout I joined since fourth grade.  I was always responsible to see that everybody was fully dressed in their proper uniform and had all the required gears, anytime we had a patrol. One day the commandant came around and told us to inform our parents that we were going to have a three day camping outside school. He later called me aside, being the patrol leader of my unit and told me to come down to his office, at 3pm, that same day, to collect the printed letter that would be handed to each student for their folks. I got down to his office 2mins earlier than 3pm, and waited for him. He never showed up, and then I left for home. The next day in school, my commandant called me out in front of the whole team, and scolded me with words I felt was harsh, and disconfirming, saying, I was irresponsible for not coming down to pick up the letters without allowing me to explain myself. According to Gibbs defensiveness-producing communication, I could highlight, control superiority and evaluation

acknowledging people_10/15-10/21

I have been interested in this topic since my first real relationship in high school. For the first time, I learned how to open up to another person and grow a strong relationship. We never had problems with communicating and always told each other what we liked, and didn’t like about the relationship. Expressing the things we felt uncomfortable with in terms of the way the relationship was going helped us fix the issues and we got through it stronger than before. We had some problems, though, that seemed to never have a resolution. The trust slowly started to disappear and nothing we did to try and fix it brought it back. As she started getting more comfortable with me, she became verbally abusive whenever things between us didn’t go his way. I felt that I needed space and some more time with my friends but she couldn’t understand why.  The most things I failed to do was to acknowledge and give recognition what she was trying to say and humbly respect her point of view on issues that concerns us. Reading this chapter brought to light what I never developed, the aspect of acknowledgment, recognition and endorsement.

 

Social Influence on emotion_q3_10/1-10/7

Social influence on emotion is being influenced by culture and belief of different people in the society. Take for example, the election coming up between Mitt Romney and President Barack Obama, the voters are going to vote into president who they are emotionally attach to, based on the way they project their personal lifestyle and what they do to make them who they are and also if either of the candidates will touch their lives on each of their personal needs. The media has helped built up a picture of both party. Now a days, people don’t have an opinion of theirs; with the fast pace of technology, people are working hard to meet up to the demands to survive.  No one has the time to build up his or her personal believe. Every one depends on what the society calls norm and what lessons it brings, which in turn affects their emotion state on issues of life.

The issues of fallacies_q2_10/1-10/7

One of the fallacies described in the book, that not occasionally occur in my intrapersonal communication now is, taking responsibility for others.  My parent gave birth to two kids, me and my little brother. The age gap between us was not that far, so my dad always tells me that I should take responsibility for my younger brother. So any time he gets into a problem, I was held responsible for him, and when he gets spanked by my dad, I felt guilty about it, and put the blame on myself. I could remember a time when he got into a fight at high school, then I was about transferring to college, he got a deep cut on his hand, so bad that the ambulance had to take him away for treatment. It was so bad, that it got me thinking that it was my lack of watching over him that got him to the hospital. Over the years, I learnt how to deal with this issue. I had to read books that dealt with taking responsibilities for one self and attended seminar on building me to take responsibility for myself and let others take theirs. I learnt to control my intrapersonal communication, by constantly reminding myself that, I can’t control the decisions people would want to take for their lives, and in as much can’t control the consequences that accompany every decision made.

perceptual influences_q1_10/1-10/7

In chapter 7, it talks about emotion and communication, and one of the perspectives of emotion that made the most sense to me was perceptual influences on emotion which emphasizes on the facts that emotion has no meaning, only to the degree of significance we attach to it. The perceptual influences on emotion deals on how we label a particular event around us and have a lot to do with the way we react to things we encounter in our external part of self. For example, anger can be viewed as being positive or negative, depending on the way we perceive the situation and how we label it to react. Negative anger can lead to increased blood pressure, and also makes it difficult to think straight, and it can harm your physical and mental health. Many instances, people are disturbed, not based on what the situation might be, but how they label it to be.